Sick again...

So, I am sick… once again! Just a cold this time.. but will it ever end? It is taking on a different course than usual.. Usually my colds start out with a sore throat and then it moves into runny nose, congestion and sneezing and ends with a dry cough. This time I started with the runny nose and sneezing a few days ago. And last night the sore throat really hit! The kind of sore throat that causes you to swallow ever few seconds.. and hurts every time you do. I definitely lost sleep over it. Which isn’t good, especially since I have been in desperate need of sleep for the past few days now.

And I’m not sure if this was another symptom or not… but I practically fainted twice yesterday. I can always tell when it is coming, so I can get on the floor quickly before it causes me to fall to the floor. Hot flashes and cold sweats, dizziness, and then the vision starts going black. I can usually get down quick enough so that my vision doesn’t go completely black (it starts from the peripheral and works its way to the center). This time, I heard crickets in my ears. You know how you get that ringing in your ears sometimes? Well, it was just like that only the ringing sounded like a steady song of crickets chirping. I’m not sure what exactly causes my fainting spells. A lot of the time crackers, water, and rest help me feel better. But like I said, I don’t know if it had anything to do with the cold I have.

I am trying to get out of a slump and it seems like one thing after another hinders me from moving forward. But I am trying not to listen to the negative voices inside my head. I cannot be hindered by guilt or worthlessness. It’s okay to sleep and rest to be happy, healthy and stress-free. And it’s okay to do that during the day, if I can’t during the evening. And my husband really doesn’t care what the house looks like.. just a long as he has clothes to wear and food to eat. My worth is not judged by how much I do or clean every day. And I don’t have to compare how much I do with how much my husband does. He will keep loving me anyway even when I don’t measure up. It is nice to have a clean house.. it is a peaceful, stress-free haven for my husband. But resting in God’s presence is even better than resting in a clean house! My relationship with God comes even before the responsibilities He’s given me. Because I can’t take on those responsibilities without that relationship!

Sleep on tight... ‘Till the sunlight burns you happy. Until the sunlight burns a happy hole in your heart. <3

Sleep

I wonder if it is possible to catch up on sleep. I have always heard that it is not. But then why do I feel like I do it so very often?

If I get 6 hours of sleep at night (and 8 is what I need), then I have a nap during the day to make up for the time lost. This works well for me.. I can actually stay awake throughout the entire day when I do this.

However, when I miss out on some sleep, and try to stay awake the entire day.. I am completely drained by evening-time. Especially if I keep busy during the day. If I go 2 or 3 days like this, without any naps, I can become numbingly sick and faint due to lack of sleep. Which is really pathetic, considering most people get little sleep. But if I feel this way, and I take a nap.. for, say, maybe a few hours, I can wake up feeling great. Isn't that what catching up on sleep is??

Just today.... I had gone a few days without catching up on sleep. I was doing some yoga (of all things) when I started feeling faint. I had to lay down immediately. After a few hours, I woke up.. and I feel fine now.

It's weird, because it's not like I'm taking about getting 2 or 3 hours of sleep at night. Just any amount less that what I need (which apparently is alot). Although... Even when I do get 2 or 3 hours of sleep, or if I pull an all-nighter, I can completely crash the next day.. getting really deep sleep (I am usually a light sleeper) and when I wake up, it's like nothing happened.

Part of the problem is my schedule. My 'bed-time' is some time between 10 and 2. I can't change this because my husband is a night owl, and I like to keep him company. I sometimes end up falling asleep on the couch until he is ready to go to bed. Then in the morning, I wake up to help him get off to work. My first alarm goes off either at 5:50 or 6:50 depending on the day. Like I said, I am a light sleeper, so I always wake up to these alarms (doesn't mean I'm ready to get up). Usually 2 hours later, once he is off to work, I will lay back down just to catch up on any sleep I had missed that night. I have no idea how my husband does it everyday; He is such a strong person. And nocturnal, did I mention?

Another part of the problem is our bed. We have a box spring mattress. It's not falling apart or anything, but the springs dig into me every night. I end up tossing and turning. Or I just lay there uncomfortably numb. I mean, I usually sleep through it, but I don't suspect it is the greatest sleep I am getting. Sometimes I think the couch is more comfortable (if only I could stretch out all the way on it... Ok, so it's a love-seat.)

I guess the only other problem it could be is, well... me. Somehow. I haven't quite figured that one out yet. I mean, I try to live a healthy lifestyle. I try to eat healthy. I avoid fast-food and sodas. I try to exercise at least a little bit. I mean, I know plenty of people with completely un-healthy lifestyles and they don't have this problem. I guess some people do just need more sleep... but seriously, this is just absolutely pathetic!

Crazy thing is, I am a morning person. I just love first thing in the morning. It's my favorite part of the day... if only I could be awake for it!

Dinner Tonight

Vegetable and Barely Bean Soup

3 cups water
1 cup broth
1 small can tomato paste
seasonings (including garlic, red pepper, chipotle seasoning)
1 cup barley
1 can pinto and great northern beans
1 can lima beans
1 small can sweet corn
2-3 celery sticks- chopped
1/2 green pepper- chopped
some mixed veggies
small handful spinach leaves- chopped/ ripped

I made up this recipe by throwing all ingredients into crock-pot and cooking on low all day (or until DH gets home from work.) It fits into the whole 'healthy eating' thing that I am trying to do.

Healthy eating

So, lately I have been thinking about eating healthier. Not to loose weight, but to gain energy and feel all around better. I have noticed that too much comfort foods, while they feel oh so good, can cause me to be sluggish, lazy, have a foggy mind and indigestion.
The problem is, I LOVE pastas and breads and 'creamy' things. In my healthy-eating plan, I will try to eat only whole-wheat pasta. The thing is, I am very picky when it comes to texture. I don't like the texture of whole-wheat, beans, or nuts. I made a white bean alfredo sauce the other day, and it tasted alright, but the texture is what turns me off. How can I get past the gritty texture of healthy foods???